22 August 2008


The sky is gloomy again. Just like my thoughts nowadays. I have been trying to convince myself. La Tahzan. But my heart not willing to listen to my brain. Most likely they are not in good terms. There need to be some sort of co-ordination here. But resistance seems to be the issue.

It scares me most of the time. Again my problem. I have become accustom to being around him and relying so much on him when times are bad. I am worried if things don’t turn out right. How am I going to face it? The end result will be either to make it or to break it.

Like the law of nature, after the rain there will definitely be sunshine. And on better days, rainbows might appear. The flowers blooming and the birds chirping merrily. That is what I am waiting for.

He said I always expect the best. Who wouldn’t? If not, I won’t be considered human right? Yes I know because of such expectation it leads to destruction. But due to the same expectation, it brings me to where I am now. Being able to propel forward and sometimes exceed my own expectations.

And what those lectures taught me: To look at both sides of the coin. And choose a stand. Thus, I am choosing to stay with my beliefs.

After what I have went through and after alterations to my lifestyle, I am still firm with this one.

Some things just don’t and won’t change. :)

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