31 August 2007

Continuing from where I have left.
I opted to sleep the whole day and it never felt this good before.
I emailed countless of pictures we took together and realised that there aint many good ones.
Thinking that a year have pass, I definitely think that there have not been alot of pictures.


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I am in mood for some love tonight.
And I hope you love me MORE than I love you. :)

I have been watching lots of videos at youtube.com and I am starting to think that hey, this is way better than TeeVee.
Almost a year not feeling the way I am now.
I foresee my future in between the mist.
I am back to where I was.

If only they see it.
If only they know it.
Perhaps there might be a change.


I am craving for Naan, a good old hindi movie, peace and a lovely bouquet of colourful flowers (I know this will not come true)to cheer me up.

Haiz..I think silence is golden afterall. I should have known better.
It wasnt about me all the time. It's about others too.
I have failed to make someone happy. I am failing miserably.
I am slowly deteriorating.
I am weakening.
I am losing the zest of life.
Will it ever come back to me?
Today is the second time in a week I get away from work. Monday I took a half day while today I am going to be on Medical leave. Actually, work is not a problem at all. In fact, yesterday I cleared all my work which left me with none for today. My superior wont be around today so what will I do then. With my condition like this I dont want to risk breaking down in the office. It will definitely be the last thing that I want to happen. I plan to sleep the whole day or perhaps ask for sleeping pills so that I can sleep without any disturbance. So that I can temporarily run away into dreamland and be happy. Hmmm... Or let's see if there are other better options. In fact, I have a couple in my mind. To either start exploring Canon Ixus 70 at Bedok Reservoir or watch a movie alone since I have plenty of movies that I want to watch anyway.
I want to have a good laugh once more. Please, can anyone do miracle?
My new found jealousy. The receptionist.
She is so happy-go-lucky that sometimes I begin to wonder.
Dont anything affect her at all?
Dont she have any worries?
She still looks young despite being 50 over.
I want to age gracefully like her.
I dont want to age like the office adhoc cleaner.
Aging in misery.

26 August 2007

I tried to sleep but I cant. Thus, here I am trying to do something fruitful.
Have not been blogging alot lately. I was basically rushing everywhere. Not exactly EVERYWHERE but I am definitely more busy than any other weeks. My job aside, I was busy watching plays. Words cant describe my happiness. Oh finally!

Like today, I managed to catch "The Mismatched Girl" at Substation. I had a difficult time in search of the venue and it was such an embarrassment I tell you! Halfway through searching for it, it started to drizzle then it got heavy. Wah! Damn it. So merepek. Thankfully, the show have yet to start when we reached. Phew!

Alright, I guess enough of the complains and I shall move on to my opinion about the play. Three words: Worth the MONEY!

1) Excellent Technical support. Sound and lighting sychronizes well.
2) The Set was simple but like the saying goes.. Less is MORE.
3) Great directing. Kudos to the Director!
4) Good usage of Audience Interaction in the middle of the play.

Why do people hate each other?
Because they cant stand one another.
Because they know each other too well.
Why people grow old?
Because it's normal for people to grow old.
Why do people love?
Because their hearts tell them to.
Why cats and dogs cannot live together?
Because it's the way of life.
No.Dogs and cats CAN live together.
Why do people cry and then laugh?
Because after they cry then they learn how to laugh.
Because people cannot cry for long. They will die.
Geselan viola
mengalun melodi
menyusun irama
Ketika kelu lidah
Hilang kata
Tanpa madah
I told myself not to shop. BUT I did. Again. Succumb to desire. Argh!
I need to save money for my future.
Mind you not only for marriage but for plans before that too. My OWN plans.
A Two-year old birthday celebration.
I finally got for her a reasonably nice present and I am happy with myself.
I spent it for a child's happiness. Priceless. :)

19 August 2007


Your Russian Name Is...
Paraaha Anitchka Ivanov

You Belong in 1983
Wild, over the top, and just a little bit cheesy. You're colorful at night - and successful during the day.

Aquarius - Your Love Profile
Your positive traits:
You've got a ton of friends, so you have no problem meeting new people.You're great at thinking up new things and activities to do with your sweetie.You tend to let the little things slide in relationships... and focus on the bigger picture.
Your negative traits:
In relationships, it tends to be your way or the highway.You can never open up completely to someone - you have to keep parts of yourself secret.You're cold and reserved, which leaves your partner feeling unloved.
Your ideal partner:
Flexible, because you're not going to be the one to compromise!Is smart and quirky with lots of weird interests... including you.A true individualist who doesn't care what anyone thinks
Your dating style:
Stimulating. You prefer dates that explore a shared interest - like a lecture, muesum tour, or concert.
Your seduction style:
Wacky. Your wild ideas have your lover wondering what's next.Insatiable - it takes a lot to satisfy your desires.Varied. You're eager to try things as soon as you learn about them.
Tips for the future:
Bring a little responsibility to your relationship - like showing up for dates!Compromise a little. It would kill you to do things your lover's way for once.Be aware of your partner's jealousy. Even though you aren't jealous, realize your partner is sometimes.
Best color to attract mate: Sky blue
Best day for a date: Wednesday

The Keys to Your Heart
You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.
In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.
You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.
You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.
Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.
Your risk of cheating is 100%. You are not suited for a monogamous relationship.
You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.
In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

He's Absolutely Committed to You!
Your guy is committed to you, as if you were already marriedAnd hopefully, you show the same commitment to himWhile you may have had your ups and downs, you've smoothed things outIf the two of you aren't serious, you will be soonSo start secretly planning your weddingIt may happen sooner than you think!

Your Hidden Talent
You are a great communicator. You have a real way with words.You're never at a loss to explain what you mean or how you feel.People find it easy to empathize with you, no matter what your situation.When you're up, you make everyone happy. But when you're down, everyone suffers.

Your Love Quote
Love is like pi -- natural, irrational, and very important.

Your Gemstone is Emerald
Balanced, liberated, and peaceful. You bring luck into any situation.
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I resign to fate
I cant heal this
I have stop all effort to make things better
I shall let it be
Let them be
I'm tired
I want to just sleep

18 August 2007

Becoming Roystan

OMG! Alvin is now on the Big Screen. Kudos!
I am still in awe.
So much have changed.


I'm in love with the songs used in this movie. I particularly enjoyed this one most.
If you have yet to watch it, please catch it soon.
No matter at which cinema and at what price.
It is entertaining.

12 August 2007

I finally decided.
Between the two, I shall forgo the one I have least interest in.

It is good to re-visit the past once awhile but apparently not all are good.
I felt like I was given a cold treatment.
I felt not all were happy.
I felt unwelcome.
Or maybe it was just me?

Saturday's outing with Nadira was like old days.
Swenson's Chocolate fondue + updates+ tour at vivo = Like old times
Ok Nad if you are online one of these days, I shall sent to you the pictures.

Movies that I want to watch

1) 881
2) Rush Hour 3
3) Hairspray
4) The Simpsons movie
5) Bourne Ultimatum

People whom I want to meet up soon

1) Nadira
2) Faezah
3) Ashikin
4) Maryam

* Highlighted in blue- I have met up wif recently
Highlighted in red- Have yet to meet up

On last Friday, I met up with one of my secondary school friends who I have not meet for 1 year. So decided to update each other about what's happening. It was fun. I have never laugh so much in one night eversince I dont remember when. It definitely reminds me of my secondary school. For goodness sake, I miss school lah! :(


I have decided to start my weekly jog at the stadium for healthy lifestyle sake and to detoxify unwanted toxins in my body.

Been doing it for 2 weeks now. Kudos to myself. Hope that I can be discipline enough not to quit halfway.

10 August 2007

Wohoo! Today I shall self-declare it the "non-government" day!
Nothing much to be done at work except for some clearing up to be done
tomorrow is weekend.

I am so loving it.
Now I am basically slacking throughout.
Drafting a few Writs and surfing the net whole day.
Afterall, my boss is not in to supervise. :)

08 August 2007

In approximately 38 minutes will mark our Nation's 42nd Birthday
I hereby would like to take this opportunity to congratulate this developed island for its success and continuous prosperity
Together we STAND UP for SINGAPORE!

Majulah Singapura
Tanah air ku
Di mana titik permulaan hidupku bersemi
Dan mungkin di sinilah aku bersemadi

07 August 2007

I took the same quiz I saw in Nad's blog..
And I am..

You Are a Pinky
You are fiercely independent, and possibly downright weird.A great communicator, you can get along with almost anyone.You are kind and sympathetic. You support all your friends - and love them for who they are.
You get along well with: The Ring Finger
Stay away from: The Thumb
http://www.blogthings.com/whatfingerareyouquiz/">What Finger Are You?

06 August 2007

My Randomness

This is just to remind myself of what's the true meaning of living.

It is all because of you..

At times it feels as though you lose all you have got and feel so empty
You cannot find the reason that make you smile
Hey I found it
I always have the answer only that I was ignorant

At times, I just cant help it but to curse and swear silently.
I am not timid but the anger is just too fatal.
If I lose it, I'll lose it all.
Haiyoh! Why lah my colleagues are just fu**ing annoying?!
Tell me why?
*strangles them one by one*

05 August 2007

Keep Holding On
You're not alone
Together we stand
I'll be by your side, you know I'll take your hand
When it gets cold
And it feels like the end
There's no place to go
You know I won't give in
No I won't give in
Keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through
Just stay strong
'Cause you know I'm here for you, I'm here for you
There's nothing you could say
Nothing you could do
There's no other way when it comes to the truth
So keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through
So far away
I wish you were here
Before it's too late, this could all disappear
Before the doors close
And it comes to an end
With you by my side I will fight and defend
I'll fight and defend
Yeah, yeah
Keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through
Just stay strong
'Cause you know I'm here for you, I'm here for you
There's nothing you could say
Nothing you could do
There's no other way when it comes to the truth
So keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through
Hear me when I say, when I say I believe
Nothing's gonna change, nothing's gonna change destiny
Whatever's meant to be will work out perfectly
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
La da da da
La da da da
La da da da da da da da da
Keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through
Just stay strong
'Cause you know I'm here for you, I'm here for you
There's nothing you could say
Nothing you could do
There's no other way when it comes to the truth
So keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through
Keep holding on
Keep holding on
There's nothing you could say
Nothing you could do
There's no other way when it comes to the truth
So keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through
A joke went all wrong huh?
Some realisation hits you too deep inside that you cant really accept it neither get over it.

Before I proceed any further with my updates, I would like to thank people who regularly visited my blog for the past few months only to discover that there werent much updates except for some random music videos from 2 different language. Sorry to disappoint.

I am in no obligations to update this blog with all the bad memories. It is just so yesterday.
I used to be that teenager with ounces of angst to pour out and let it flow freely. But all that seems like a long time ago. In fact, alot of matters feel like a long time ago. I feel so old now.

Haha. Oh well, look what have I become? Some boring adults. Less expressive, creative and innovative. Hey I am tired of living my life the way it is. I am tired of complaining over every single things. I am tired of shedding tears for people who wont care less. I am plain tired of typing out my life out in words.


I know you are going to read this one day or another. So here it goes..

It is all more than what meet the eyes. It is all about in between the lines.
The other day it feels so wrong and when it's time to be with you, all the wrong seems right.
I am not a supergirl to fight all that was thrown to me.
Your words can hurt like a sword.
But funny how your words can be the cure to the wound you cause.
Maybe that's the magic you possess. That no one else have.


Yesterday, I attended another Magus Luna by TP Dramatec members.
There's some confession I want to make right up here.
I didnt like the feeling yesterday.
I felt so lost.
I felt so out of place.
Worst I was with the people I know for years.
How ironic!


I just realise I have tone down alot. Maybe it's the age.
I hate the aging process.
It burns a hole in my pocket too!