15 June 2009

When two worlds collide, explosion is an understatement

Finally, I redeemed myself from 6 days of worthless activities.
Long breaks are seriously unhealthy and it keeps me away from doing constructive work.

By the way, he is freaking me out with his dedication to studies and work.
He seems to be putting in ten times extra effort than what I did in the 1st year.
He definitely will not be facing any problems in his studies.

Alright, I have been kinda holding on a dream but nowadays this dream is giving me chills somehow.
As time tick by, two years wont be that long afterall. Am I prepared? Hell no!

I am not prepared for so many things. Especially religiously.
My knowledge is insufficient and I am scared.
Of course I need to start somewhere and I don't even know where and how.
I am not gaining knowledge to lead me through just for the two years but to lead me through my life. My future.

Hmm...Perhaps this long break can be useful to sort my life out and to do some re-adjustments.

Oh well, nowadays constant bickering seem to be a norm. Our differences seem to be much more apparent now then it has been years before. I am sorry for being so intolerant and petty. I think I shouldn't treat you differently from others.
I shouldn't impose a different standards on you. I am so sorry for being very difficult.
I, myself cant seem to understand
my actions sometimes.
Maybe I just crave extra attention from you. Maybe I am not even thinking.
I spurt out words
that pierce like a dagger. Yet you still stay. I thank you for that.
For believing in me when no one else did.
For being by my side when I was alone.
For sharing my joy and wiping my tears.

I know this is such a private affair to be shared with the whole world but since it reveals nothing too personal so I don't mind posting it up.

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